march madness

This month has been full of hope and new beginnings..and as it comes to a close I find myself looking forward to April and beyond.

I plan to take two classes in the Fall at UNLV as a non-degree seeking student (NDSS), but registration doesn't commence until mid April. And NDSSs must wait until accepted students register before we can choose classes. So we'll see what I'm left with. As I mentioned in the last post, I'll be doing my best to work around my current work schedule, meaning cross your fingers that there will be some evening or late afternoon classes offered and still available. In addition, the classes available may have little or no relevance to my concentration of study, but hey, I'm just trying to prove to them I can do it. We'll have to wait and see. I haven't hit my parents up yet for the money because I want the exact amount right in front of me to show them. I'm not forseeing problems with that, but you know what happens when you don't expect the worst. Bingo! Disappointment.

To help combat a little of the above stress as well as get my health and body in shape, Mark and I started P90X (see last post for a little more info). We did a one week run through where we did the workouts and followed the diet program, getting our minds and bodies into the swing of things. We both saw results after just one week. Check out my fitness blog Lean & Mean: A Goth Girl's Guide to Getting Fit to see some "before" photos and how the first week went. I'm currently blogging about the second week, or moreover, the first "official" week. All I can say is that its amazing what changes you can make with proper diet and exercise.

In other news, Mark had new plants and trees put in on Friday. His yard was fairly desolate, but finally its beginning to look more alive. And you all should know how much I miss "green" living in Las Vegas. Desert landscaping is tough if you want something besides rocks, cactus, or dry brown bushes. The soil is basically hard clay, actually caliche, pronounched ka-lee-chee. The weather is hot and dry and the choices are limited when it comes to plans and trees that will withstand such conditions. Mark enlisted the help of a local nursery to help him choose appropriately and get the new greenery transported and planted. He's been hard at work installing a drip system and I think the whole yard will come together nicely. As a bonus, Mark dedicated a section along a side wall for me to grow a couple vegetables and herbs. With a raised bed, I think I can do it. You'd think the idea of a vegetable garden in the desert might sound ridiculous, but many varieties of plants enjoy this type of climate and do rather well. I'm not going overboard...initially...and plan to start with tomatoes, red and green lettuce, spinach, and red and green chili peppers. For herbs, I'm going with basil, dill, and shallots. I chose these plants because I know I'll use them and since this is my first foray into gardening I wanted to keep it simple. The official planting date is mid April so you'll get to see how it goes. I know Shae and Maura garden so I hope you'll give me some helpful tips, guys!

In my inbox a few days ago I received an email to join a local Meetup called the Las Vegas Creative Fiction Writing Critique group. A long name for something fairly simple. Writers helping other writers with positive criticism. I took it as a sign to get my writing back in gear. Even though the group is not necessarily Romance specific, a few of the members write Romance, and most importantly the group leader, so I don't think I'd feel out of place. The group is dedicated to critiquing any members work that wants it. I think I'm ready for this, and I'd actually like to hear some non-Romance readers' and writers' opinions as well. The first meeting is April 3rd @ 10am at a local Barnes and Noble. Check out the link Shae and anyone else if you're interested in joining, or if you'd like to see what Meetup.com is all about. I had to let my RWA and local Chapter memberships lapse due to lack of funds and since this is free, I hope it turns out to be something productive. I'll be letting you know how our first meeting goes.

Off to work out.

Quote of the Day: The process of writing has something infinite about it. Even though it is interrupted each night, it is one single notation. ~Elias Canetti

spring cleaning

It's already March and it seems, once again, I've neglected to just keep writing...or at least, keep the people interested in my wayward life up to date on what the hell is going on with it.

No more procrastination. I'm jumping right in. Bombs away!

It's been a wild couple of months. After blogging about my 2010 resolutions I thought I might have a little downtime for once. You know, to reflect, organize and push forward. Umm. No.

One of my main resolutions was to go back to school. I want to further my education and finally nurture my interests into a rewarding, meaningful career. I contacted a former professor (also a former boyfriend) and asked him how I should go about the whole process. He advised that instead of applying for my Masters, that I apply for my PhD, considering I planned to go that direction anyway and in his experience more funding and benefits were given to the PhD students. I understood the logic and decided to follow his advice. However, it meant I'd have to get all my application materials submitted by the deadline of February 1st.

At first, panic set in. I had less than 3 weeks to get 3 letters of recommendation, transcripts from the colleges I'd attended, a lengthy writing sample, a statement of purpose, and take the GRE, which I had yet to study for, to the history department of UNLV. Normal people would say that I was certifiably insane.

By some strange miracle I managed to get everything on a forward moving track by the last week and a half. I even had meetings set up with the Graduate School Director and the Graduate Program Director of the History Department for Friday and was scheduled to take the GRE the following Wednesday.

Then the first of my three disasters struck...

A quick trip to Target with Mark on a rainy Wednesday evening resulted in my purse being stolen and my car window being punched out.

I've never had my car broken into and I've never had my purse stolen. I've lost my purse once, but it was found and returned. I guess I'd been lucky all this time. Yet, it wasn't all for naught. I did have my wallet on me at the time, so the thieves got my brand new purse that was a Christmas gift, my cell phone, my checkbook, my camera, some extra keys, my address book/planner, a fleece hat and gloves, my make-up bag, some grad school application materials, and (sniff sniff) the notebook I write EVERYTHING in...from grocery lists to pieces for my novels. Other writers, I'm sure you feel my pain on that one. Yes, it could have been a lot worse though. I was worried about the criminals having access to my address and all my friends and family's addresses, but the people I know convinced me the perps were probably only looking for cash, credit cards, and expensive phones or gadgets they could sell. They most likely ditched the rest when they didn't see anything useful. I had to file a police report, another first for me, and open a new checking account. I did get an iPhone to replace my stolen cell (and OMG its awesome!). I set about getting the other things replaced and my car window fixed, but I couldn't fall apart. I mean, I had meetings that Friday AND a big test to study for!

The meetings resulted in rethinking applying for the PhD. Both the directors advised to go for the MA first. I had to agree with them since they knew the best course of action at UNLV. Now, the MA deadline isn't until June 1st, but in order to get a Graduate Assistantship (a large portion of my tuition taken care of if I taught a class) I'd have to still get my application in by February 1st. Also, the MA didn't require GRE scores. Although, since I already signed up and couldn't get my money back I decided to continue my crash course studying and take it, submitting everything by the February 1st deadline.

And so the second disaster struck....

The GRE went horribly. And no, I'm not exaggerating here. I knew one of my essays was altogether wrong (I misread the directions) and the math portion was downright evil. The questions are supposed to get more difficult as you get them right, but mine kept getting easier and for God's sake I still couldn't get them correct. It was brutal and discouraging. I didn't feel too bad knowing I didn't have to record my scores (which I chose not to) and that it was a learning experience for the if and when I have to take it again for the PhD. I so hope I never have to set eyes on it again though.

The following weekend I spruced up an old undergraduate essay for my writing sample and wrote a kick-ass statement of purpose (I really did like my work on that ;-)). It was tight, but I got everything in by February 1st. A few things came up, giving me a chance to get to know various directors, administrative assistants and program counselors, but my application was officially complete and so I waited. I was relieved, anxious, excited, and pretty darn nervous.

Moving on to disaster number three....

Not only did I not receive a graduate assistantship, but I was denied admission. Okay, I wasn't exactly told flat out not to waste their time, I was told that they enjoyed reading my application, but were unsure I was prepared for graduate work. In conclusion, they want me to defer my application to a later date and take a couple of classes as a non-degree seeking student. My grades as an undergrad fell just below 3.0, so I'm assuming they want me to prove I can hang with the other more GPA savvy students. Sigh. This news was pretty disheartening in the beginning since my friends had pumped me up, leading me to believe there was no way I'd be refused. I mean, I'm smart, passionate, driven and it's UNLV, not Yale! Who applies for graduate school in history in Las Vegas anyway. I really did think I was a shoe-in. Ha! See what getting overly excited does?! Where the hell did I leave my low expectations?! I'm so ashamed. I know the rules. Low expectations = low disappointment!

Anyway, the two biggest problems with taking classes as a non-degree seeking student is....no funding or loans for the tuition, so I'd have to come up with the money myself. And not being a full time student with expenses paid, I'd have to keep my job and take classes around my work schedule. Joy. I'd have to find late afternoon or evening classes, which are few and far between, and I'd have to discuss it all with my boss in order to rearrange my schedule. As for the money, I'll have to ask my parents for help. I hate doing that, but this is incredibly important to me and I don't want my pride to get in the way of living a dream.

Now, I'm looking for some questions to be answered regarding what classes to take and then changing my application. After I know exactly how much this will cost, I'll be hitting up the parents. I'll keep you posted on that as it unfolds.

In other news, Valentine's Day came and went. It's been almost 7 months for Mark and I and we're still going strong. I'm happier than I've been in a long time. I had an orchid send to his work a few days before the Day of Love as a surprise. He likes surprises and he knows my feelings on V-Day. I don't need to be totally fawned over, I just like to be acknowledged with a few words or a simple card or something original. Mark was a little discouraged that he couldn't get me exactly what he wanted, but it really is the thought that counts and after we talked about it, he ended up buying me a Wii. I'll deal ;-) He also gave me a sweet card. The card would have been enough, but he was adamant about doing something above and beyond. He's the best. And he's adorable.

Together we're embarking on a new adventure as of this Monday. All this graduate school prep is a chance for me (and him) to make a change for the better. Since I'm on the road to improving myself intellectually, I didn't want to fall behind with improvement physically. I've talked about diet and exercise before in my blog and they are in my resolution list. Well, Monday, we're starting P90X, a fitness program that you've probably seen on TV. It's an intense combination of diet and exercise that Mark and I have been researching for a while. We finally decided to BRING IT! as Tony Horton, the creator of the program exclaims in each DVD you do every day. Also, as inspired by my fabulous writing buddies, Maura and Shae, I decided to keep a separate blog to journal my fitness journey. Check out lean and mean, the goth girl's guide to getting fit (and ripped!) in the next day or so to see my first post!

On the writing front, with all the deadlines and disasters of the last couple months my revisions have fallen by the wayside. And now I've set myself up with a rigorous reading schedule before I begin my classes in the fall as well as an intense exercise regimene for the next 90 days. Baby steps for the revisions though, right? I haven't forgotten my novel and school can only add to it. I'm counting on things falling into place as the workouts commence, classes begin, and my life straightens out.

Last, I wanted to congratulate Maura on finishing her novel and synopsis and getting it sent off! Props to Shae for her debut on the big screen here in Vegas, too! You both rock and I hope we continue to encourage each other for years to come.

Quote of the Day: Writing is a struggle against silence. ~Carlos Fuentes

2009 resolutions revisited for 2010

Happy New Year everyone! After a couple months of blog neglect, I'm back with a vengeance. It's a new year and I'm filled with a fresh sense of excitement and renewal. Just writing new numbers when typing the date makes me feel like I'm starting over. In a way it inspires me to change and grow...for the better of course; and ultimately record the goals and dreams that will help me with that growth. The organizer in me also jumps for joy because I get the chance to clean out closets, my room and my head - getting rid of the old and the useless and the clutter. Then I look at a clean daily planner and fantasize....ahh, to begin again.

I decided to go back to last years' resolution post and edit/revise. Since that IS where I am with my novel -revisions- I figured it would be appropriate.
2010 - New Year Resolutions

1) Publish my novel.

Last year I wanted to publish the trilogy, but I got ahead of myself. Especially with some new things I'm adding to my plate this year. One at a time...One at a time. I plan to continue with my revisions and write every day. I need to keep the momentum going.

2) Exercise.

Waiting for the weight bench Mark keeps mentioning he'll get for me. (wink wink) I joke. Its up to ME and only me. The plan with the bench is already there. I have the exercises and the schedule. Now to just do it! My body screams at me at times to move and though I hate to run, I find myself aching to do just that. Odd, huh? But other than that I want to start Yoga. I think it would benefit me in so many ways...with my stress, my flexibility, the knots and kinks in my back and neck, and with my writing of course (thanks for that spark of an idea, Matt!). I have videos galore and with YouTube and the internet, I'm sure I can get a program going for 3 to 4 times a week.

3) Eat better and drink more water.

I went back to pescatarianism (vegetarian who eats fish and/or shellfish) about 8 months ago and am still going strong. My previous foray into not eating meat lasted about a year and then I began having strange dreams about meat that stressed me out so much I finally caved and went back to my carnivore ways. Unfortunately, I gained 25 pounds eating meat and especially fast food. Add unhappiness to the equation and you have the potential for disaster. I started exercising right before the move out of my ex's house. That helped, but after the move I began researching vegetarianism and veganism again. I read more books (check out Skinny Bitch, it will kick you in the butt and open your eyes to some horrors going on in the world of food) and became more aware and knowledgeable about what really goes on in the meat industry. I realized I wanted to stop eating meat for health reasons, to make a stand about commericialized slaughtering and processing of animals, and to help the environment. I'm hoping to eat less fish and shellfish as well and adopt a near-vegan lifestyle, limiting the animal products I use and consume. I lost the weight I gained 8 months ago and feel better in general, but I find I still get stuck in ruts when it comes to meatless food. I miss variety and when it comes down to it, it's unnecessary because there are a TON of meatless dishes to partake in. So part of the eating better goal is to cook more vegetarian meals and experiment with spices and flavors. Also, I have to give Mark props for being incredibly supportive of my vegetarianism even though he eats meat. He's always concerned about what I can eat and takes an active interest in vegetarianism and the meals I make. I sometimes get emotional over certain things and make snide or sarcastic comments but he takes them in stride and it makes me respect him even more! Oh and I should be drinking 8 glasses of water a day, minimum.

4) Drink more wine.

Still stands.

5) Get finances in order.

I'm not doing badly. But Im not doing well either. I exist. Barely. This is in part because I don't make much at my job. Dont get me wrong. I love that I even HAVE a job, one that I don't mind going to everyday, and one that gives me benefits and vacation days, and a stable work history. But I could be doing so much better. I have a degree and I'm damn smart. One of my later resolutions will show you one of the ways I plan to fix this *could be doing better* issue, but for now I need to get back to getting the debt gone and gone for good. A while ago I thought about buying a home but was told to get the debt down or else I'd have a home with no money to do anything else. Then I was thinking of moving back East, but still wanted to get myself in a good financial position. I still want to get myself up to speed and I'm still working on it. A friend gave me Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover last year and I keep coming back to it because it's an awesome no-nonsense system. I'm taking it one step at a time and hope to be debt free one day. It takes time, but I'm confident. Even with all my student loans! :-)

6) Travel.

Mark and I are planning a small trip this month either to San Simeon to see Hearst Castle or over to Colorado Springs. Both would be fun considering I love to travel and want to do more of it. Eventually (and hopefully in conjunction with my last resolution) I'll be able to go to Europe or overseas this or next year. I will be getting my passport in the next two months, too. I would also like to journal my travels, in the written word AND photographically. And maybe one day I'll get the scrapbooks done for my Rhode Island trips.

7) Learn to knit.

I'd like to have a tangible, practical skill. When the end of the world comes and I'm left in the countryside to rebuild the human species and society, what the heck could I provide for my fellow survivors? How about a sweater? It gets damn cold in the aftermath.
Actually, I think it would just be nice to knit a scarf, some socks, or a hat.

8) Go to Grad School.

Ok, so this is the BIG one. I'm hungry for intellectual stimulation. I'm sure Vegas has something to do with it because it's severely lacking in this department. Not that there isn't any here. You can find it...in the small corners of the city, at the college, or in certain people....but it's not the city's main focus. And it isn't prevalent at my job. Luckily I have Mark, my family and my friends, who consider it vastly important. But I'd always hoped to do something more with myself and my career. Writing helps that, but I'd like to get involved in something that could become steady work and a chance to give back, teach, inspire... I mentioned that I was interested in history and the Regency period more specifically, but I'm also interested in what it takes to become involved in curation at museums, art galleries, etc. I found that Public History is the way toward that and at UNLV you can tack that on to your area of study. Perfect! I plan on setting up a meeting with the graduate coordinator for this month to go over how it all works and what I need to do financially, mentally, and professionally to prepare and get in for the Fall. Its all very exciting.

So that's it. Those are my resolutions for 2010. And what of the others from 2009.

I have a primary doctor now. She is Mark's doctor and she was on my insurance plan. I had a

couple heart issues and after a bunch of tests, she found out I had a mitrovalve prolapse. In layman's terms that's a floppy valve. I means my heart has funky beats evert so often, but its still strong and there isn't any problem beginning a rigorous exercise regimene. My blood tests came back great except for a high amount of iron. I had a test done for Hemochromotosis, a rare blood disease, but I am just a carrier and don't have the matching gene that allows the disease to express itself. Phew...

I also have a gynocologist now. I'm clean of all disease and am on birth control again.

I still have to find another dentist.

Of learning one language a year - I plan to refresh my French since I'll need it in grad school for my area of study and work on Welsh when I can.

Of getting rid of things I don't need - I'm doing it!

I'm working on taking care of my skin, I'm looking into laser hair removal, and Mark has helped me experiment with make-up like I never have before! Can you believe I wore false eyelashes to my company Christmas party?

I got the tattoo and am looking into what I'd like next and where :-)

I've taken more photos and will try to take even more!

I'll be refraining from moving back East. I've got too much here to stay for now. Sorry Ariana. But with school and better finances I'll be able to visit more often.

And don't think I've forgotten my best writing buddies in the world. Maura and Shae, I'm heading over to both of your blogs right now to comment.

Watch out world! Here I come.